life's a downer

Life is a series of ups and downs, a never ending and constantly changing cycle. Your life and your outlook on it greatly influences the lengths and severity of these inevitable changes. Right now, I am on a serious downer and the only thing that is cheering me up right now is music and this blog. I am entering one of the toughest years of my life, a year filled to the breaking point with work, work, and more work. Junior year is a time for seriously strenuous workloads and the surmounting pressure of the SAT. As of now, I am dreading the coming weeks, hoping for some sort of catastrophe that will relieve me of this burden for a good long time. I know that everyone has gone through it, and for doing they are better people. I will survive somehow, but at this point in time, I do not quite know how. I spent the first two hours of the school year getting lectured on the importance of self-motivation and that if your not up to the challenge, you should drop the clas immediately and not look back. The class was chastised for thinking that anything would be easy anymore and that if that was your attitude you can kiss college goodbye. The threat of college and its impact on your future was the sermon on the lips of every teacher that I faced today. The impending doom of college is something that I fear everyday. It is constantly in the back of my mind, lurking there like the ghost of my future waiting to spring out an destroy everything that I have worked so hard to accomplish. The quicker that this year ends, the happier I will be. I know that I am going to have to stick this one out and that it will all be better once things settle down, but right now I am just not that into it. I hate early American literature and I have learned about the colonists about a hundred times. This year is basically going to bore the hell out of me until we reach more modern literature. I cannot wait to read some Hemingway, but I was quite perturbed that we would not be covering Faulkner. I have not read any of his stuff, but he seems to bring out extreme opinions in people, so I was hoping that an American literature course would cover some worthy American literature, but I was mistaken. The Red Badge of Courage is quite possibly one of the most boring books ever, and of course, it's one of the first novels that we are being forced to cover. American history is pretty much suicidaly boring until the Revolution, and then boring again until WWI. My life is in the downer faze, my only reconciliation is that this weekend will still be a weekend, not a pseudo-weekend filled with note-taking and pointless assignments. As they say in Latin, carpe diem, but I do not think that the Romans had to suffer through an entire year of AP American Studies.